Anthony Edwards is officially the latest NBA star to be disqualified from end-of-season awards because he didn’t meet the league’s strict 65-game minimum requirement. He got hurt, missed a few games, and now the NBA is basically telling him he doesn’t exist. I completely understand how he feels. The universe treats me like I don’t exist every single day, and I haven’t even missed any games. I’ve been sitting on my couch consecutively for 800 days in a row.
The Cruelty of Minimum Requirements
This 65-game rule is a nightmare. It puts so much pressure on these guys to perform through pain. Do you know what my minimum requirement is just to get out of bed? It’s astronomical. I have to convince myself that going to the kitchen to get a glass of water is worth the physical exertion of moving my legs. If the NBA monitored my life, I would be disqualified from receiving the “Participant in Society” award by the second week of January. I am perpetually on the injury report with “DNP – Generalized Existential Dread.”
Justice for Ant-Man
Anthony Edwards was playing out of his mind. He was dunking on people so hard I had to look away from the TV because I felt bad for the defenders’ families. And now he gets nothing? Just a pat on the back and a “better luck next year”? That is exactly what my high school guidance counselor told me when I applied for college. The system is rigged. The system hates talent. I am going to buy an Anthony Edwards jersey and wear it while I cry in the shower.

