Police just arrested a man after reports of vile discrimination at the Newcastle-Sunderland match. This is exactly why I do not go to public events. People are terrifying. You buy a ticket to watch 22 men kick a ball, and suddenly you are surrounded by aggressive, hateful individuals screaming awful things. I am officially reinforcing the deadbolts on my front door.
The Horrors of the Public Sphere
How do people have the energy to be so hateful? I barely have the energy to fold my laundry, let alone shout discriminatory slurs in a freezing cold stadium. The outside world is a lawless wasteland. If I ever accidentally find myself in a crowded stadium, I will immediately curl into a fetal position and wait for security to escort me back to my couch.
A Plea for Basic Decency
Is it so hard to just sit down, eat an overpriced hot dog, and quietly weep when your team loses? Why must we resort to vile behavior? I am locking myself in my closet with a flashlight and a box of Cheez-Its until humanity learns how to behave. It might be a very long time. Send more Cheez-Its.
