I just looked at the NBA Playoff picture, and everything is completely logical. The teams with the best players have the best records. The teams that are rebuilding are at the bottom. This level of stability is deeply, profoundly terrifying to me.
Where is the Chaos?
I rely on sports to reflect the chaotic, uncontrollable nature of my own life. When the standings make sense, it implies that hard work and planning actually pay off. If that’s true, then what is my excuse for eating a frozen pizza over the sink at 3 PM on a Tuesday? I need a massive upset to validate my own personal failures.
A Plea for Disaster
Please, I am begging the basketball gods. Let an 8-seed sweep a 1-seed. Let a superstar forget how to dribble. I cannot handle an orderly, predictable postseason. It forces me to look inward, and I absolutely refuse to do that.
