I checked my bracket this morning. It flatlined. No pulse. No hope. I had Illinois losing early, UConn losing late, and Duke losing always. I was wrong about everything.
My bracket isn’t just busted — it’s a crime scene. I’ve already apologized to it twice. I keep refreshing the app like it’s going to say, “Just kidding, you’re actually a genius.” It does not.
They say it’s all luck. I say it’s personal.
