I Joined Fantasy Baseball and Immediately Regretted It
Fantasy baseball is supposed to be fun. Instead, I drafted 14 pitchers, forgot outfielders exist, and now I’m projected to finish 12th in a 10‑team…
The Wolverines Are on an Elite Run and I Need a Brown Paper Bag
Michigan is in the Elite Eight, and I am currently breathing heavily into a Kroger paper bag. I wasn’t prepared for them to be this…
My Bracket Is Dead and So Am I
I checked my bracket this morning. It flatlined. No pulse. No hope. I had Illinois losing early, UConn losing late, and Duke losing always. I…
I Aged Seven Years Watching UConn and Duke Try to Emotionally Destroy Me
UConn and Duke played a basketball game that should come with a surgeon general warning. I sat down expecting a normal Elite Eight showdown. Instead,…
UConn Hit a Historic Buzzer Beater and My Soul Temporarily Left My Body
I was standing in my living room holding a lukewarm cup of coffee when UConn’s shot went up. The ball hung in the air for…
I Spent Four Hours Analyzing a Substitution That Didn’t Matter and Now I Can’t Sleep
Last night, a manager made a substitution in the 84th minute. A harmless, routine, “let’s give the kid some minutes” kind of change. For normal…
I Watched a Preseason Friendly Like It Was the Champions League Final and I Regret Nothing
I know what you’re thinking: “Kip, it’s just preseason. Calm down.” And to that I say: absolutely not. Last night I watched a preseason friendly…